Awake All Night

That's it! Fuck it's cold! September 3rd and I am feeling like I am going to freeze to death! No joke! Fall weather is so fucking unpredictable! Like this morning it was pleasant, well it was not to cold anyway. This afternoon it was hot. Like it was to hot with pants, so I would have had said yes to a dress. Hahaha. Now, at around 11 PM I am freezing to death. OMG! it shouldn't be like this. NO! NO way! Like I am sitting here in my UCLA sweat pants and my 1D hoddie, plus I am wearing three pairs of socks. My feet are always cold so that's really not an excuse, but the problem is that I am cold. Freezing to death cold! Aaaaah! I almost can't take this anymore.

I have been thinking weather I should go back to school or just whatever I should do. Like it's hard! I do and I don't but I also think that education is important. But it's like I don't want to go to school in Sweden because there aren't any fun schools, or I mean any schools that offer anything fun to study. Stockholm University was boring as fuck. Tried that, not going back. There is one school though but it is really hard to get accepted too, they only admit 5 people per program every other year. So I have to wait until next fall then. Well I have to wait until spring until I apply. Then there is this thing that I really don't, I mean kind of and preferably don't want to move back to SB. The thing, the good thing about SBCC is that the spring semester ends in May and SMC in Santa Monica ends in the middle of June and that a huge mother fucking problem for me. I mean HELLO, I am going to see One Direction in London next year. I can always sell my ticket. There is this school in NYC though that ends at the end of May. Hmmm, but to i really want to live in NYC. I mean, I am really tired if this cold fucking weather. OMG, I am so over it (that was one of the reasons that I moved to Cali last year). It's the 1D concert that sets up a big problem for me. I just want to cry 'cause the only one that can make a decision is me and it's frustrating.

I mean but also I feel like these months since I have been back in Sweden I have come to love or appreciate Stockholm more. I don't know why, I just have. Or maybe I just feel like I am going to go away and taking advantage of everything until I part from Sweden again. Maybe I should just do something different and go to England or Australia instead. Hahaha. I was actually going to go to Australia but CSN can't process paperwork in time and then I had about a month and half to apply, get everything ready and I just felt that that would have had been to stressful to do. I don't know what I'll do.


your writer, Erika

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